She sat on the stoop waiting, her heart heavy and aching with anticipation so strongly that at times she wished she didn’t have one. She had been there for an hour or more with no sign. Yet she wasn’t too worried because she had her ace in the hole.
Another hour. She was lost in thought when her mama came up behind her and tried to gently guide her into the house. She would have none of it. Breaking from her mother’s grasp she said defiantly, “No! This time he is coming! He is. I know it deep, deep in me. He is!” Her words were strong yet after her mother left her she could not help but to let out a sigh and ask herself, “Is he really?”
Many times her resolve was tempted with things like a bike ride to the park with the next door neighbor’s family (a real one, she thought to herself) or a game of kick the can in the street with a group of kids from the neighborhood. But she would not budge. She was convinced that this time he would come. Sure, in the past he may not have always kept his word, but this time was different.
Today was her tenth birthday, and instead of the latest game, record, or book, she had asked for and (because money was tight) received only three things: a grown up dress (not from the kid section), a pretty pink shawl, and a brand new pair of one inch heels. She had never worn high heels before, so had practiced and practiced in them until she could walk without tottering. She couldn’t wait to show off her new skill to her daddy.
He had once told her in the past that when she was more grown up he would spend more time with her. “Grown up how?” she had asked. He pointed to a woman who wore a long flowing dress with a pink shawl and high heels. From then on she dreamed of the day when she would be old enough to wear high heels and a long flowing dress.
Another hour and the air was starting to get a chill in it. She could not tell, but her mother was inside frantically trying to get ahold of him to no avail. He was as he always was.
Another hour and the darkness started to descend. It was then she knew the truth... you know, that thing that’ll set you free. So she took off the high heels that she had practiced so hard to walk in, threw them away, and went inside. Heavy-hearted, she went straight to bed.
When her mother came in later to tell her how sorry she was, the little girl just shrugged her shoulders and remarked, “Who needs a father anyway?”
Another hour. She was lost in thought when her mama came up behind her and tried to gently guide her into the house. She would have none of it. Breaking from her mother’s grasp she said defiantly, “No! This time he is coming! He is. I know it deep, deep in me. He is!” Her words were strong yet after her mother left her she could not help but to let out a sigh and ask herself, “Is he really?”
Many times her resolve was tempted with things like a bike ride to the park with the next door neighbor’s family (a real one, she thought to herself) or a game of kick the can in the street with a group of kids from the neighborhood. But she would not budge. She was convinced that this time he would come. Sure, in the past he may not have always kept his word, but this time was different.
Today was her tenth birthday, and instead of the latest game, record, or book, she had asked for and (because money was tight) received only three things: a grown up dress (not from the kid section), a pretty pink shawl, and a brand new pair of one inch heels. She had never worn high heels before, so had practiced and practiced in them until she could walk without tottering. She couldn’t wait to show off her new skill to her daddy.
He had once told her in the past that when she was more grown up he would spend more time with her. “Grown up how?” she had asked. He pointed to a woman who wore a long flowing dress with a pink shawl and high heels. From then on she dreamed of the day when she would be old enough to wear high heels and a long flowing dress.
Another hour and the air was starting to get a chill in it. She could not tell, but her mother was inside frantically trying to get ahold of him to no avail. He was as he always was.
Another hour and the darkness started to descend. It was then she knew the truth... you know, that thing that’ll set you free. So she took off the high heels that she had practiced so hard to walk in, threw them away, and went inside. Heavy-hearted, she went straight to bed.
When her mother came in later to tell her how sorry she was, the little girl just shrugged her shoulders and remarked, “Who needs a father anyway?”
This is a taste of my book... To know God as Father. This bit is designed to show the hurt children feel when their fathers aren't around.
If you like it please join the group I have created for it to help spread the word of the forthcoming book that is designed to show is we all need God no matter weather our earthly fathers were Good or had some hurts that held them back from exemplifying God Love to Us.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/group.php?gid=100518640987&ref=ts
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